Top 10 ways to be the "Funny Guy" in your new offi
Posted: Fri Mar 12, 2004 11:36 am
> Top 10 ways to be the "Funny Guy" in your new office:
> > 10. Keep telling the same person they have bad breath even if they don't,
> and then punch them in the face.
>
9. Announce in a meeting that you have AIDS. After
> everyone gives you the sympathy remarks, tell everyone
> how you were just kidding and tell them that
> they are all a bunch of fucking queers.
>
> 8. Before a meeting, fill your mouth with custard.
> Then during the meeting, put one finger in the air
> and make a noise like you are hocking up a loogie.
> Then spit the custard into a glass and hand it to the
> person next to you and say, "Beat that."
>
> 7. Inform a male co-worker that he "wouldn't make a
> good hooker." Then piss in his coffee and tell him
> that he needs a good ass fucking.
>
> 6. Always walk around with a big smile on your
> face and keep one hand down your pants.
>
> 5. Answer every question asked to you with "Fuck if I
> know" then call the person a racial slur that doesn't
> even match their
> race.
>
> 4. Brag about the fact that you own a gun, and
> keep playing with
> your nuts. Get them all sweaty, and then walk around
> shaking
> everyone's hands.
>
> 3. Shit on the floor in your office and when
> someone comes in and
> see's it, tell them it is the fake plastic kind. When
> they try to pick it up, and realize that their hand is
> covered in shit, laugh at them and point a them
> and call them a fucking asshole.
>
> 2. Run down the hall with your dick out while pissing
> all over and yell, "It won't stop! Help me!" Then
> when it stops, look down and say "oh"
>
> 1. Ask to borrow someones pen. Bring it into the
> bathroom and stick it in your ass. Take it back to
> the person you borrowed from and ask them
> to smell it. When they tell you that it smells bad,
> tell them, "It should. I had it in my ass."
> > 10. Keep telling the same person they have bad breath even if they don't,
> and then punch them in the face.
>
9. Announce in a meeting that you have AIDS. After
> everyone gives you the sympathy remarks, tell everyone
> how you were just kidding and tell them that
> they are all a bunch of fucking queers.
>
> 8. Before a meeting, fill your mouth with custard.
> Then during the meeting, put one finger in the air
> and make a noise like you are hocking up a loogie.
> Then spit the custard into a glass and hand it to the
> person next to you and say, "Beat that."
>
> 7. Inform a male co-worker that he "wouldn't make a
> good hooker." Then piss in his coffee and tell him
> that he needs a good ass fucking.
>
> 6. Always walk around with a big smile on your
> face and keep one hand down your pants.
>
> 5. Answer every question asked to you with "Fuck if I
> know" then call the person a racial slur that doesn't
> even match their
> race.
>
> 4. Brag about the fact that you own a gun, and
> keep playing with
> your nuts. Get them all sweaty, and then walk around
> shaking
> everyone's hands.
>
> 3. Shit on the floor in your office and when
> someone comes in and
> see's it, tell them it is the fake plastic kind. When
> they try to pick it up, and realize that their hand is
> covered in shit, laugh at them and point a them
> and call them a fucking asshole.
>
> 2. Run down the hall with your dick out while pissing
> all over and yell, "It won't stop! Help me!" Then
> when it stops, look down and say "oh"
>
> 1. Ask to borrow someones pen. Bring it into the
> bathroom and stick it in your ass. Take it back to
> the person you borrowed from and ask them
> to smell it. When they tell you that it smells bad,
> tell them, "It should. I had it in my ass."
